Yes I know the song lyrics are actually "Always a Bridesmaid, never a Bride," but our Book Club opted to read an autobiography this time and (because I'm a Vicar of Dibley fan) I suggested Dawn French's book 'Dear Fatty'.

It's very easy to read because she has written her memoirs in the form of letters to various characters in her life, but one of the things that jumped out at me was her desperate desire to be a bridesmaid...

For years she rehearsed, alongside her best friend, with amazing dedication for the part and is very honest about the devastation she felt when a relative excluded her in favour of other nieces. In the end she went to the wedding wearing a bright pink trouser suit complete with cape and jockey cap to try and upstage them. Not a great look!

It's hard to choose, isn't it, when you have lots of friends and relatives? No wonder some couples fly off to a beach to avoid the politics!

Garry and I wanted a very simple affair when we got married but I was keenly aware of his four nieces aged between 5 and 8 and - to be honest - it cost us very little for four cotton dresses and flower headbands. It was no great hassle to let them follow me into the tiny church but may well be the reason why we have a good relationship now. They are all in their 40's now and probably never ever think about it but if they had felt rejected and been hurt it might have soured our relationship for ever, who knows.

It's lovely to be asked to take part in someone's wedding - whether that's to do a reading, be the Best Man, bridesmaid or usher. Or to escort the bride - and a variety of people do this now rather than the father. At one wedding I took, the Bride's son walked her up the aisle and the Bridegroom was escorted in by his two grown up daughters.

It's been my privilege to actually officiate at weddings of people I know and love, and it is such an honour to do that. Weddings are the favourite part of my ministry and I've heard lots of Vicars express that sentiment.

People do love weddings - apparently when The Vicar of Dibley got married herself in the series, 12.3 million people tuned into watch her. I'm not sure how many viewers the Royal Weddings usually draw but that nearly equalled Prince Edward & Sophie's audience.

I love Dawn French for her rawness and self-deprecating humour, and the book 'Dear Fatty' is so typically her. One comment that leapt out at me was this:
"As is so often the case with me, I know I won't get most things exactly right, so I seek the parts I CAN do and love, and enjoy those, in the full knowledge that someone is doing the other perfect stuff confidently elsewhere. Just not me. Hey-ho."

That's a great philosophy for life. Lets do the things we can do, and love, and enjoy them - leaving perfection to others. Every blessing to you Dawn - and to all other bridesmaids out there.
j x