Help - I'm not religious!

I've been reading through the Church of England's official responses to frequently asked questions, which the editor has helpfully posted on this site. I already knew them off by heart of course - just 'brushing up' you understand!

When I saw the question "We're not sure we're religious enough, does that matter?" I wanted to yell "NO - stay as sweet as you are!" But then I'm biased because I'm not religious either.

That might be a surprising statement coming from a woman wearing a dog collar - and yes it is a real collar you can see in the photo (though most Vicars could have suggested another use for Fairy Liquid bottles while watching Blue Peter with our childen) - but I digress.

Let me explain - in my book the word 'religion' suggests a set of rituals to be adhered to in order to satisfy or please God. I believe that Christianity is unique among faiths because we don't have to adopt any sort of routine in order to belong.

Instead of religion the focus is relationship. We come to God as Father - which I think is a very different situation. If your own relationship with your earthly father is/was not a positive experience then bring to mind your closest friend and imagine I'm talking about them instead.

If the love between you is warm and genuine then it doesn't matter so much if some time elapses between visits. You'll find that you can pick up the conversation where you left it last, enjoy each other's company and finally leave, insisting that you won't leave it as long next time. You miss them when they're not around and you also miss out on the warm benefits of the relationship.

That's what God is like. So if you haven't spoken to him for a while then why not renew your acquaintance? You could even try it now. Seize the moment. You can stay in your seat and the person at the next desk won't even notice.

Talk to him - or just simply be still and let your heart do the talking. That's still a valid prayer (He's an excellent mind and heart reader). Does that feel good? I think prayer is like taking a long, hot bath with a bar of chocolate, but without the calories. But that's my experience. Yours will be personal to you.

If you stick around long enough you'll really begin to feel the benefit (unless you get the sack - in which case ..ooopps sorry!) You might even find yourself drawn to go to church to be among people who also feel that God is very significant in their lives and who enjoy telling him how great he is.

Then you WILL think you're religious enough to get married there and all will be well. If that's the case, please don't start getting legalistic over liturgy or pompous about pews, or I might have to knock you off my Christmas Card list :-)