You are hereBlessing instead of marriage?
Blessing instead of marriage?
Dear Resident Reverend,
I am supposed to be married on Saturday but due to various uncertainties and the fact I am pregnant I was wondering if we could just have a blessing instead.
Would this still involve the hymns and readings or would we need to cut everything out. I understand it would be unusual to do one without a civil ceremony but is it still possible. I would like to make a committment to my partner but wait until we sort out our few problems and have the baby before completing the legal side of things.
Thank you,
Sarah
Bookmark/Search this post with:
Tags
Hi Sarah
I'm not sure what is behind your question but I have a feeling you are struggling rather a lot and I don't want to add to your distress. A minister would always be happy to ask for God's blessing upon you - either as individuals or as a couple but what are you actually asking for God's blessing upon? A temporary or a permanent future?
The Church of England 'blessing service' is actually a Thanksgiving for Marriage so probably not suitable if the marriage has never taken place . You can download the service from the Church of England site
http://www.cofe.anglican.org/worship/downloads/rtf/thnks_mg.rtf
The fact that you are pregnant is not a problem as far as the church ceremony is concerned. However, from the legal perspective your partner will not be the child's next of kin unless you marry or he legally adopts the child.
You say you want to stand before God and commit yourself to being with him until death parts you - are you sure about this?
If so then why not include the legal bit?
If you're not sure then don't make the vows.
No-one is stopping you having the reception/party if you feel jovial enough to go through with it - especially as it will all be paid for by now!
This could just be 'cold feet' or maybe someone is interfering. You can choose not to let these things come between you. But if there is a reason why you really don't want to marry then you need to sit down together and start talking. A cobbled together service just to go through the motions is not the answer.
Whatever you decide here's a prayer of blessing for you now:
The Lord bless you and watch over you,
the Lord make his face shine upon you
and be gracious to you,
the Lord look kindly on you
and give you peace;
and the blessing of God almighty,
the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit,
be among you and remain with you always.
Amen